T. Jackson

I like to think I can't be summed up in one sentence. This may not be true.

100 Things About Me

1. I have three cats.
2. Each cat has its own voice and fabricated back story.
3. I see nothing wrong with this, though I rarely mention it to others.
4. While the occasions on which I drink have decreased, when I do, I still try to drink as much as I did at 22.
5. I'm not 22 and my body reminds me of this daily.
6. I have degrees in English, philosophy, and creative writing--a trifecta of pretension and uselessness.
7. I like to make jokes about having pretensions, but only because I believe I'm beating others to the punch.
8. I collect movie trivia like others collect sports trivia.
9. I will destroy you at any variation of the movie/actor game "Six Degrees."
10. I value friendships as much as I value family.
11. My family will tell you that I value friendships more than my family.
12. My tendency for perfectionism generally results in procrastination.
13. It took me weeks to finish this list.
14. Most of that time was spent getting the courage to start.
15. I have lived in fourteen apartments, houses, and dorm rooms in the last twelve years.
16. I hate moving with a searing passion.
17. I hate U-Haul even more than that.
18. I drove a $200 '84 Chevette for two years with a pair of vice grips clamped to a nubbin of metal for a gear shift.
19. Until just now, I've never used the word "nubbin" in a sentence.
20. The sound of someone else cutting their fingernails is the most awful sound in the world.
21. For five months, I lived with six sorority girls in a four-bedroom, one-bathroom house.
22. I have Boy-Scout hair and little imagination for an alternative.
23. I’m open to suggestions.
24. I once ate a pound of cooked spaghetti with sauce in one sitting.
25. I once snorted a line of crushed red pepper in a Pizza Hut on a dare.
26. I have been stalked by a rabid squirrel.
27. My older brother will kick your ass if you fuck with me.
28. My older brother used to beat the ever-loving crap out of me on a daily basis.
29. I once drove from Fort Collins, Colorado to Palm Beach, Florida by myself without stopping except for gas, food, and bathrooms—a trip of 36 hours.
30. I promised myself when I saw the sun set for the second time on that drive that I would never do that again.
31. Five days later, I drove from Key West, Florida to Fort Collins, Colorado by myself without stopping except for gas, food, and bathrooms—a trip of 40 hours.
32. I am impatient.
33. I have a tendency toward martyrdom.
34. Other drivers are always wrong and should have their licenses revoked. Always.
35. The picture in the lower-left-hand corner of the open dictionary on my desk is of a vespertilionid, or a bat, to you plebeians.
36. I am incapable of having one favorite anything because there are just too many amazing books, movies, albums, places, and people to settle on one, but I’ll never stop looking.
37. The only exception to this is my wife—the coolest person on the planet in all of history, forever and ever, amen. Seriously, you would weep with regret if you knew just how much luckier I am than you.
38. The fact that my wife would say I’m being hyperbolic, even though I’m not, only increases your weep factor.
39. Between the ages of twenty and twenty-three, I did have one favorite band. I saw this band in concert eight times, once driving from Iowa to Memphis to see this band play.
40. The fact that this band was the Dave Matthews Band is why I no longer just have one favorite anything.
41. I have much to be ashamed of.
42. I can’t believe I’m not even halfway done yet.
43. One of the coolest characters in literature is Shakespeare’s Richard III.
44. I can never run for political office.
45. I have tried and tried to quit smoking, but drinking always fouls it up.
46. I wear bifocals.
47. Over Christmas break of my freshman year in college, I did an experiment to see how long I could stay awake.
48. I can stay awake for over eighty hours.
49. I might have gone longer but I started watching Paris, Texas and dropped like a stone.
50. There are few things more awesome than a group of reunited friends raising their glasses in a toast.
51. I know next to nothing about way too many things.
52. Nothing is more frustrating to me than being confronted with my own ignorance.
53. The more I get to travel the happier I am.
54. I have gotten happier as I’ve gotten older.
55. My attention span is only rivaled by my cats.
56. Early mornings are the best time of day.
57. Including my current one, I have held nineteen jobs over the last fifteen years.
58. I have only been fired twice.
59. I haven’t had cable, or television reception of any kind, since 1999.
60. This is not because I am snooty, but because I’m an addict.
61. A cup of strong, black coffee is unparalleled.
62. I have two tattoos.
63. I am a member of a fraternity.
64. I have been to the funerals of two former professors.
65. I gave one of the eulogies at one of them.
66. I never left the country until I was 29.
67. I have two nephews, one brother, one half-sister, ten aunts and uncles, and somewhere around forty cousins and second-cousins.
68. I have been to 30 of the 50 states.
69. I love roller coasters and most any other amusement park ride.
70. As I was finishing my BA, the only thing that stood between me and graduation was writing a paper that was eighteen months overdue on Caesar’s Gallic Wars. For an elective.
71. I’m pretty sure that I mentioned I am the king of all procrastinators.
72. I spend a lot of each day in awe at the brilliance and imagination of others.
73. I would much rather send you an email than speak to you on the phone.
74. I believe strongly that it is “email,” “website,” and “internet.” Although, on this last, I can be persuaded.
75. Certain points of grammatical disagreement are for me akin to the debate over the designated hitter rule. For instance, I believe people who do not use the serial comma are immoral.
76. There are few experiences as rewarding as hearing that someone appreciated your recommendation and is now very excited about the band/book/movie you recommended.
77. I’m very conflicted over the inherent egotism in the pleasure I take from that.
78. I mean, it’s not like I created the music/book/movie, and yet, there’s an element of ownership that creeps into any recommendation that’s both satisfying and repulsive.
79. As penance for this satisfaction, I try to remain very open to others’ recommendations.
80. I think too much and this shows in my writing.
81. I am not my fucking khakis.
82. I used to have hair to my shoulders and a beard to my shirt collar.
83. Snippets of movie dialogue sometimes get stuck in my head the way a catchy song might.
84. The most memorable phrase to stick in my head was Fredo saying “Cuba libre” in The Godfather Part II. KOO-baa LEE-braay.
85. Alec Baldwin shouting, “Get them to sign on the line which is dotted!” and “Coffee is for closers!” in Glengarry Glen Ross are two more.
86. I rarely remember my dreams.
87. I am not religious, but I respect the good it can do for people.
88. One of my biggest fears, though, is an over-religiosity that leads to willful ignorance, prejudice, hatred, and hypocrisy.
89. I believe that time is on my side.
90. I believe that rolling stones should stop and gather a bit of moss now and then. Moss gives us texture, individuality, and character.
91. I have been accused of being bad relationship material because, in her words, I came from a “broken home.”
92. Another ex-girlfriend told me that I would spend the rest of my life “unhappy and alone.”
93. I once fell 11,000 feet from the sky and want to do this again.
94. I know, at my most honest, that if I didn’t have to work for a living that I would not descend into depression or become bored. I would stay busy. In pajamas.
95. I have a lot to learn about how to make Creekside Review as cool and as functional as I envision it.
96. I am excited about this, but am frustrated by the time it will take.
97. Sometimes when I read my own writing, it reads like it was written in a foreign language.
98. I am grateful for every hit Creekside gets. Thanks for stopping by, reading, and—if you’ve posted a link to this little corner—you are awesome.
99. You would think that my self-consciousness would have stopped me from creating this list, let alone setting up a website.
100. Yet here it is, I never knew that I had 100 Things in me, even if I cheated a little and used the list itself as a couple of entries and a couple of entries could feasibly be combined under one entry. All the same—you try it.